_to write darkness

A man can no more diminish God’s glory by refusing to worship Him than a lunatic can put out the sun by scribbling the word, ‘darkness’ on the walls of his cell. _c.s. lewis

Posts Tagged ‘church shopping’

church or the lack of it.

Posted by abramjanson on April 5, 2009

so… it’s sunday. the sabbath. and i didn’t go to church today.  i didn’t oversleep or stay up too late. i just didn’t want to. church has been an interesting or shall we say disinteresting thing for me lately.  i woke up this morning with every intention of going… and i consciously opted out. i felt my morning would be much more beneficial if i spent it with myself; reading, listening, sitting here… (blogging… lol)  

 

so i’ disinterested.  when i go to church… I’m so distracted with everything else going on in my life i can’t hardly listen and when I do listen… i feel what is being said is wishy washy irrelevant uninteresting unapplicable crap.  i’ve become very cynical. 

 

is this wrong?  “Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching”

 

Regardless… I had a great, blessed morning. 

 

Traveling mercies.

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Disinterested.

Posted by abramjanson on March 8, 2009

I have been quite disinterested in church lately.  I don’t belong to a church here at school.  I frequent many.  I slide in and out quickly. But I haven’t found one that I “believe” in.  I didn’t use the word “fit” because I don’t necessarily think “fit” is the right word… I think that may be an epidemic of sorts in our society… looking for some place where we can be comfortable… and blend in… and simply just fit… like putting on a new pair of socks.  So in essence, I have been “church shopping” for the past three years.  I think it is interesting though how my search for a church is drastically similar to that of shopping for a new pair of pants, or shirt, or even car for that matter.  

 

Pants got to “fit” just right.  There are a lot of things that go into this complex process we label, “fitting.”  First of all, they have to look good from the outside… You got to look hip and fresh… the same goes with a church.  How often do we judge a church according to its appearance or the shape of its building or the make up of it’s congregation?  Whether in approval or disapproval… its a judgement. Secondly, pants got to feel right.  The church must make you feel good… right?  Warm fuzzies are key to a good church.  Coffee and donuts in the foyer. Dim lights to set the mood. You get the point.  Thirdly, pants must be the right size.  You cannot be rocking it if it is too small…  or too big.  I think we error on the side of too big… it is easier to blend in that way… nobody knows my name or my past.  Bigger is better.  Fourth of all… and maybe the most over looked… pants have to be constructed of quality materials in order to hold up to life’s tests.  Is it ignorant for me to say we shop for churches focusing more on our emotions… how the church makes us feel… or look… or sound… or what superficial benefits we can get out of it… rather than what it teaches, what it believes in, it’s mission, it’s purpose, it’s attitudes toward service, and it’s commitment to biblical teaching?

I haven’t found a church that I believe in.  Maybe I am too cynical and too idealistic… But I can’t force myself to be apart of a body in which I don’t agree with (the teaching, the views, the leadership, etc.)  Granted… there are churches that I enjoy… I really do.  But I have not found one that I believe has a true, firm grip on a Holy God in one hand and in the other a grip on a hurting world. 

 

And… no. I am not church bashing.  Just trying to verbalize my thoughts and my frustrations lately.

 

So what?

 

I have noticed a difference in my life.  Immersing oneself in community is one of the greatest encouragements a human being can receive.  I have been missing the church… a community of believers that I resound with.  And… it has slowly worn me down.  In Hebrews it says, “Let us not give up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but let us encourage one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.”  This could never be more true.

So I guess I am still on a journey searching for a community I can immerse myself into… I don’t think it is finding that one necessarily anymore… but rather it is choosing a body of believers to invest in and to encourage… because I am called to do so. No one’s perfect… including myself.  So why am I looking for a perfect church?  After all… a church is not the building that people gather in… that is simply a building. The community of believers is the church. We are the church. 

 

This may have been a bit random and unconnected… and possibly a lot of rambling… but I hope it gives you a little glimpse of where I am at in this area of my life. 

 

Traveling mercies.

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